Silhouette Portrait- Carly Sobolewski

I titled my silhouette portrait; She Sees Beauty (Never in Herself). I knew from the start that the colors I wanted to feature were black and gray, but I also wanted to incorporate some source of vibrant color. I really wanted to push myself as well as my comfort zone by making a piece that is personal as well as something that expresses the emotions and struggles I deal with on a daily basis

I decided to trace my silhouette twice and make it look like the figures were facing one another and interacting. The black figure is supposed to appear as a reflection in the mirror. The pointed finger suggests that orders are being given or that the other figure is being told to remain silent (“shhh”). The silhouette in black represents the recurring, negative thoughts and personal enemy that I fight each day in regard to my body image/appearance. I chose the color black because for me it resonates feelings of power, strength, grief, and fear. Every time I catch a glance of myself in a reflective surface whether it be a mirror or not, destructive thoughts come racing into my head. My mind begins to over-think, ridicule, and pick-apart every perceived flaw. The act of looking at myself in a mirror is a scary thing that I tend to avoid but am working on ways to overcome the struggle and cope in more constructive ways.

The gray silhouette surrounded by colorful flowers is positioned with its’ head downward in order to suggest shame, doubt, weakness, and vulnerability. These are the emotions that I deal with because of negative body image. I chose to use the color gray because when I see gray I get a sense of emptiness, a bit of sadness, insecurity, and isolation. The gray is cut into rectangular, bar-like strips to symbolize prison bars. At times I feel so stuck and caught up in the thoughts and effort to be “perfect” that I can feel restrained and isolated. It is like the figure in the mirror, my own reflection, is bullying me to the point that I start to believe that what it’s saying is true. I wanted the gray figure to look vague and blurred among the flowers to represent that my identity is not clear and it sort of fades into the background. The vibrant flowers of pink, red, blue, yellow, and purple are all happy colors that make me smile. Even though I battle with myself everyday, I am capable of seeing beauty and positivity in EVERYTHING else around me (people, places, animals, nature, actions, relationships words, etc.) My surroundings are full of liveliness, opportunity, and beauty.

All of the shapes I used (squares, triangles, circles, and rectangles) are geometric. I am a person who is more comfortable when things are in order and predictable. I tend to be less spontaneous and have always been a huge perfectionist so for me geometric figures represent control.

The title of my artwork, She Sees Beauty (Never in Herself), was inspired by what I learned while doing this project and hints at what the intended meaning of the piece is. When looking in the mirror I may not see beauty in myself but I am able to see the splendor and beauty around me and that gives me hope! This project allowed me to express struggle in my life without using words, only colors and shape. It made me aware of how I see myself and inspired me to think about what I want to see change in the future.